Lazing about yesterday night it occurred to me that men are now beginning to shave things other than their faces. The word shave makes me unhappy. Shaving is such a lame waste of time for so little benefit. I did some research and found that this horrible craze for shaving began for American women in 1915 as a result of some ad campaign that convinced women that if you don't shave you're unhygienic. Society embraced it and now women are all screwed because society would freak out if we didn't shave. If I saw a woman with truly hairy pits, I would feel the need to point it out to everyone I knew and gawk. Damn me for playing into this ad generated ploy.
True, men have been shaving their faces since forever, but men, I implore you, hold your ground with the rest of your hair! Don't make society flip a magical switch and convince you that shaving your chest, arms, armpits, legs and nether regions is the way to go! Too many men are shaving their chests for that slick, tanned poolside look. Football players shave their legs so they can tape them up, but when the season is over some keep shaving! I've seen men clip down their armpit hair! As someone that is forced to shave because of society's standards for femininity, please, stop this madness! At the rate men are going, this thing will snowball and leave them with nothing to show for shaving but razor burn and sadness.