Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Vacation: Flare Up Edition!

Ahoy, ye scurvy dogs! About a week ago I went on vacation to visit my sister in Florida before she goes overseas. We spent every day doing at least one super fun thing. The only thing that put a damper on my trip was the fact that I'm in the midst of a colitis flareup. I will attempt to tell you via photo/captions about the highs and lows of the trip.
Soaking in the beautiful scene at Ft. Walton Beach.
Underwater adventure, wherein I ponder the question, "Am I going to take a shit in the ocean?"
Getting rough with a greedy llama as he tries to take all the food I bought to feed the zoo animals, wherein I ponder, "Am I going to take a shit while yelling at this llama?"
Plowing through the open water on a wave runner, wherein I ponder, "Am I going to take a shit in the open ocean and attract one or more sharks, which will lead to my very untidy demise?"
Photo op on the pier, wherein I ponder "Am I going to take a shit on the pier?"
Up close and personal with a sea lion at Gulf World Marine Park, wherein I ponder "Am I going to take a shit while standing beside a sea lion?"
And finally, holding hands with a 500 pound, 30 year old dolphin named Sandy, wherein I ponder "Am I going to take a shit while holding hands with a dolphin?" I am happy to report that, while many shits were taken, I did not shit in any undesignated shitting areas. Despite my fear of extreme humiliation, I made the decision that I had to fully experience my vacation and take the risk of shame. It turned out alright this time. Maybe next time it won't, but I can't stop having fun, even if the fun is to be had between bouts of pain and frenzy. I was also able to grab Sandy's fin while she took me on a short ride around the tank. Every picture I took in the dolphin tank captures the childlike joy that I experienced during the time I was there, which was worth every second of uncertainty.


  1. This is probably one of the funniest, yet heartfelt, posts you've made in awhile. Now I feel anyone could use that line as a joke that will spread like, well, diseases. *Friends hanging out at Disneyland: "Am I going to take a shit while hugging Minnie Mouse?* Anyways, you're awesome and I'm glad you had a great time.

  2. Oh, honey. I'm SO glad you were able to be in the moment and not miss any fun! Thank you for sharing your vulnerability with us. My fave is "untidy demise". Say, if you come visit me in Costa Rica you can wonder if you're going to take a shit zip lining across a jungle canopy - oh, wait. . . everyone does that. ;) Love ya my little llama scolding sistah.

  3. Ooh, AND I could practice my Spanish! You must be having a blast. Live it up!

    1. Great post. I remember those thoughts so well.